Longtime customer
by Hordepally
Summary: Sometimes you need to know when to get out. Sometimes it's too late to get out. One shot. Featuring Tony Soprano, Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtier and some crazy guy from Gotham.


**A/N: **I'm a huge Sopranos fan and just had to do this. I realize most of the people who read my stuff have probably never watched it or liked it so sorry about that!

Tony is of course Tony Soprano and Paulie is Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtier. Paulie is one of my favorite characters on the show.

**Longtime Customer**

_Somewhere in New Jersey  
_

"Please tell me this is the last time. You gotta tell me that Tony."

"For Christ's sake Paulie, didn't I say this was it? Huh? _This is it_."

Paulie relaxed but only a little. Tony looked over at him and rolled his eyes. "You worry too much, you know? You can't be like that with this guy. He'll smell fear on you like a dog."

"Why's he hafta come here for anyway? Why can't he stay in that shithole of a city he comes from? I say we clip 'em," Paulie muttered. "Who's gonna care? I look at him and don't know where to rest my eyes. He can't wash his hair and brush his teeth? Makes me sick to my stomach. The guy's a...."

"A freak," Tony finished the sentence for him. "And don't you ever say it to his face. You hear me? _Don't ever_."

"I know T." Paulie looked wounded.

They sat in silence. Tony stared out at the field they were parked in and tried not to think about the guy they were waiting on. The Joker. He wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the whole situation but couldn't quite manage it. The guy had been a good customer for a couple of years but he was also a nutcase. Tony knew what he'd done in Gotham and he wanted no part of things like that. Selling him guns and drugs was fine. Business was business. But this guy was a terrorist. He'd blown up a hospital. _Dressed as a fucking nurse_. Not a doctor. _A nurse_. No, he couldn't deal with that shit and had told him so over the phone.

_One more deal and I cut the crazy fuck loose. Good riddance._

If Silvio and Bobby were still around it wouldn't be so bad. He'd have trusted guys to cover his ass in case the Joker got any ideas. Now all he had was Paulie, who he trusted to a point. The problem with Paulie was he just couldn't keep his damn mouth shut. Always yakking, too quick tempered.

Headlights illuminated the long grass and Tony stubbed his cigar out. A car rumbled straight at them, coming to a stop only a few feet away.

"Okay, let's do this," Tony told Paulie. "You just stand back and let me deal with things. And keep your mouth shut, no matter what he says. Understand?"

"Sure Boss."

They exited the car. For a few seconds the occupants of the other car stayed put. Tony started to worry, his hand creeping close to the gun in his coat pocket. The Joker was a treacherous bastard. He always said he was a man of his word but Tony knew better than that. Word had gotten around about him.

The car doors opened and three figures got out. Tony recognized the Joker instantly, even in the dim light. No one else looked like that. No one. Who would want to?

"Well hi there Tony," the Joker said, striding toward them in that weird walk of his. "How are things?"

Tony forced a smile onto his face. "Good. Been busy."

"Ah. New York knocked out a few of your main guys didn't they?" The clown grinned, showing his yellow teeth. They were caked in red, probably from the paint he smeared over his lips and scars. He'd never seen the guy without that make-up.

Those godawful scars. Tony had always wondered how he'd gotten them but had never asked.

"Hello Paulie." The Joker slid his flat gaze over to the other man, still smiling.

"Hmph." Paulie grunted and Tony shot him a warning look. Paulie shrugged, not bothering to hide the look of disgust on his face.

"So....about that um merchandise. You got it, right?" The Joker looked back to Tony.

"Course I got it. You got the money, right?"

The clown gave a quick jerk of his head and one of his men scurried over with a duffel bag.

"There ya go. It's all there and then some." The Joker took the bag from his henchman and handed it to Tony.

Paulie jumped forward to grab it and the Joker giggled. "After all this ah time and you _still_ don't trust me. If I were a more...sens-itive guy I'd be hurt. Especially this being our last meeting and all."

"Yeah, you know how it is," Tony spread his hands apologetically and grinned. "Too much heat with the FBI and the shit that's been going on with New York. Things gotta die down for a while."

Those terrible eyes regarded him for a second and he barely supressed the urge to back away.

"Oh I understand." The clown's voice was full of condescending menace.

Tony let it slide. All he wanted was to get this done. "Okay, great. You'll find the stuff at the warehouse on Vermont street, same as always. A crate of .50 caliber Desert Eagles with 14 round clips, just like you wanted."

The Joker licked his lips hungrily, no doubt excited at the prospect of the havoc he could wreak with his newest purchase. "Thanks Tony. Pleasure doing business with you."

One purple-gloved hand thrust itself out towards Tony and he stared at it for a moment before shaking it.

And with that the Joker turned on his heel and was gone, his men at his heels.

"Thank God," Paulie said as they watched the headlights recede. "No more of that _thing_. It woulda been a matter of time til he crossed you T. That guy, he's got no honor. He ain't like us. You got a family, you can't risk..."

"I know," Tony snapped. "You think that didn't cross my mind everytime I looked at that freak's face?"

For two years Tony had felt like he'd struck a deal with the devil himself. Hard times had made the partnership a necessity at the time but it hadn't been worth it. Now he was free. He hoped.

He turned to Paulie. "You check the bag?"

"No Boss. I thought you said..."

"Well check the fuckin' thing already!" Tony shouted, irritated. He hadn't told Paulie to not check the bag. Paulie had been too distracted staring at the freak, that was exactly why he didn't check it.

"Okay. Okay." Paulie unzipped it and dug through the stacks of money.

Tony shook his head in disgust and headed for the car, leaving Paulie on his own.

"TONY!"

"What?"

Paulie came at him in a run, eyes wide. "T...it's a.....it's a...."

He held the bag out for Tony to see. At the very bottom was a cell phone. Tony stared at it blankly before comprehension set in.

_That backstabbing snake. It figures don't it?_

"Throw the fucking bag! Throw it!" He screamed at Paulie.

The phone began to ring. Paulie's disbelieving eyes met his.

"Are you deaf? Throw the fucking thing. Th................"

A loud boom and the world turned into a bright yellow inferno.

Before everything went black the only thing Tony could think of was how this was all Paulie's goddamn fault.


End file.
